Well Fed Productions

by **amunhra** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 1:51 pm

So this is going to sound pretty annoying and probably even whiny.

I've got a hump in my LDR and I think it's turning into a mountain

I'm looking for an unbiased opinion cos all I've got right now is, well, my opinion and that's pretty damn biased.

I live with 2 guys, one in my good friend for the past 5 years. Pat. He's a guitarist, cool guy, nice guy, but none-the-less, just a friend. The other, Mike is Pat's friend, not mine apparently as this weekend seems to have proved but that's a whole other can of worms that I'm dealing with and has nothing to do with this. I digress, sorry.

Point is, the LDR has been going rocky since my Lover-boy started thinking that Pat had feelings for me... turns out he's right

After a couple of emails between them, Pat being honest and L-B wanting to know the truth, Pat spilled beans to him that I didn't even know.

Now this doesn't affect my side in the least. Pat has always been a friend to me and I've never wanted more from him. I didn't know till today that he's had feelings for me.

Thing is Pat's going to be my roomate till I move to Australia (which I'm thinking of turning into a vacation now

) He's the only person I know and trust enough to live with and it helps aquiring the cash I need to do this move I've set my damn heart into.

Where's the problem? Well, L-B can't or more is having a hard time coping with me living with a friend of mine that has feelings for me... that I DO NOT reciprocate.

The last thing I told him was "I won't tell you that you have to deal with it

You don't have to deal with anything that causes you hurt, that's your right."

Now, I don't know what else to say or do. Am I being a fucking idiot?

Anyway, sorry if I'm annoying you guys.

by **Hitman** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 2:49 pm

Woah, sounds like a pretty fucked up situation.

First of all, I don't know how anyone can make a LDR work.
You 2 haven't actually met in person though, right?
Maybe that makes it easier in some ways, because I know how I feel about my Princess, and I can't even bear to spend one day without her.

Now, I can totally understand where LB is coming from.
I know if I had a GF who was in a situation such as yours, I would not be happy with her living with her "friend who had feelings for her" either. Especially if she lived far off in another time zone. It's totally natural for him to feel threatened and uncomfortable with the situation, and in all honesty, there's probably not a lot you can do to reassure him, other than to not live with the guy. I'm not necessarily saying that's what you should do, just putting it into perspective for you. This is not about trust issues or jealousy. It's about respecting the bond between 2 people.

I guess the best way to look at it would be to ask, how would you feel if the situation was reversed? Would you be comfortable with it?

Having said all that, if you choose to stay living how you are, and remain true and honest to your relationship, LB WILL get over it, especially once he is finally with you. Just make sure your thoughts are with him and what he must be going through...

by **Stasswardo** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 3:15 pm

LB , GF , LDR...
*head explosion*

by **Chantel** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 3:19 pm

spassy wrote::stunned: LB , GF , LDR...
*head explosion*

by **Stasswardo** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 3:26 pm

by **Hitman** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 3:43 pm

spassy wrote::stunned: LB , GF , LDR...
*head explosion*

STFU...

by **Chantel** » Tue Apr 04, 2006 3:55 pm

by **amunhra** » Wed Apr 05, 2006 12:27 am

I know you're right Hitman. It's just a really hard situation to deal with, for the both of us, and I'm sure if the situation was reversed I'd be having just as much of a hard time coping with it as he is.

Thankyou for your advice though. I'm still not sure what to do in terms of living with Pat. I seriously spend all my free time on the internet, speaking with LB. It's almost like living alone. If I had the kind of money that would allow me to live alone and be able to afford my plans, I would do that in a heart beat. I mean, I could still do it, but it would prolong my plans and I don't want to prolong anything longer than it already is.

I know what you mean about being apart, I've never met LB but being away from the computer is like being away from him. :oops: